Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Pity Party

Today has been a bit of a roller coaster... when it started, it was good... there was laughter, a bit of nostalgia, and then; a total breakdown....

Some of you know my Guam cellphone story; (I won't go into it now, lets just say it was not good) today's breakdown was sort of like that, although, not in public thank God. Here is how it all started...

I couldn't figure out an excel spreadsheet, yeah, a damn spreadsheet set me off. Go figure!
so what did I do... I broke down in tears, not just any tears, full on sobbing, snot running down my face, gasping for air, kind of tears. The kind of crying that makes you gag yourself and almost throw up. Oh yeah, that was me. 100% fit for a strait jacket!

It would have been OK if I was alone... but I wasn't. My poor coworker was there to witness the whole thing. Oh yes, she looked at me like I had a third arm growing out of the top of my head. nothing is more humbling then the look of pity someone shows you when she hands you a napkin and says "ummm you have a little something" and points to their own chin to try and tell you you have either drool or snot on yours. Oh good God I was a mess...

After about 10 minutes I calmed down... I felt better and realized that what I needed to do was just let it out. The frustration is lessened, and hopefully the hurt, anger and sadness will lessen with time as well... it just took a silly spreadsheet to do it.

I am just so glad that I have a husband that loves me unconditionally and some of the best friends in the entire world!!! I love each and every one of you!!! I am now looking for a new motivator... that doesn't involve large amounts of ice cream, cake, red wine or chocolate, I promise... ;o)
I will keep you posted...

Monday, March 8, 2010

sigh....


I have not posted in such a long time, and this one is a bit different… I am going to take a style from a friends blog and post a couple of pictures as they can express feelings without too many words… and sometimes you need just that. Sometimes, you need “Simplicity”... so Ms. Simplicity... I apologize if I overstep, but I couldn’t help myself.


I’m sure most of you know the saying, “if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” Well… I am at sort of at that point right now. WTF do I say? (Yes, I am sort if censoring this blog) I have TONS to say, albeit, most of which are not very nice and truthfully not really this persons fault… so I would have to choose my words carefully.
I cannot and will not divulge the topic, so please don’t ask…
I once uttered the words “I pride myself on not being an asshole” and I do. So once again, I will put on a happy face and make nice when I simply want to walk away and go cry in a corner.

Enough said…